Post #402 Ten Reasons Why I’m Madly in Love with My Bedroom

1. (soon i’m gonna get it back inside) my small wooden bed :)
2. always the right temperature depends on my mood AC
3. iPod + dock :)
4. (instead of carpets) very comfy sleeping bag LOL!
5. a big window to the roof (just in case someone wants to smoke runaway haha!)
6. laptop + 24hr wifi access!
7. the wall (it’s so damn cool!)
8. the wooden tiles :)
9. three full wardrobes and they’re all mine :D
10. the door :) it’s just a gallery of memorabilia (the PDXT poster that used to be there i gave it to aryo for his going to USA gift).

and from everybody who have been in my room: tante tia om adit, bunda dina, timothy, ina, jesbon, gleny, erc, putri, raissa, faby, and just everybody i didn’t remember. they all feel really comfortable in my room :D

my small bed is right now located in front of the TV. ina always love all the dolls and stuffed animals i have there and named all of them with each of the guy she’s crushing on :) timothy always falls asleep in that bed the minute he got there, adorable.

the sleeping bag i used during DBPJ sleepover at school, jambore, temu OSIS KAJ, and had been with me since the 5th grade had been spread since saturday (17/4) for me to fall asleep on during working on YB. i don’t really like working and typing on my desk :|

before the radio tower was torn down, the function of the big window on my room was to runaway. i climbed down the tower and went back up the tower :) now, with tower gone, the big window is just used for me to slip outside to the roof hangout with a can of beer and cigs.

my bedroom wall is not furnished so it has the old ancient dutch kind of look. it is soooo coool! love it so much. but frankly, the wall is like that because when my grandpapa and grandmama build the 2nd floor they didn’t have any money to finish the wall, so they left it like that and it’s awesome!

the tiles was redone when i was in the 4th grade, before it was carpet :) my grandpapa had the whole 2nd floor redone with new wooden tiles and aluminum foil cover below the roof so that the temperature inside is not tampered with the outside temperature.

it’s just so comfortable and wonderful to be in my bedroom :) add a bathroom and keyboard/piano, i’d never leave! haha :D

for college, i’ll be staying with nita and gleny nearby campus. that’s 4years + 18 months (for me to work) i’m not going to be fulltime in my bedroom. a little bit sad but excited :D

well, TTYL for now :)

oh, and i made two pictures today. the first one got me and timothy in a very laugh-ish shout-ish phonecall and the other one is just plain adorable. so i’m just going to post the second one :D

this is supposedly timothy satyaabieza :) he said it’s cute :D

NIGHT ALL! :) MGLL

Post #401 A Bit Relevant to the Previous One

so today, there was another big soccer match: Social vs Science Gonzaga Class of 2010 :)

got sick since early in the morning and so i went home early as well. darn! went to the doctor though. he said there’s a possibility towards “batu empedu” (what the hell that is. but it sounds scary, it needs surgery to remove it, so God please not that one) but generally, my liver’s acting up.

because of today’s sick day: i can’t go to dufan with my class tomorrow :( i’ve got to rest. then i got so so so pissed and disappointed.

and then, during a phone call timothy mentioned that andriy and himself wanted to come over to my house and visit but they were too tired. but just the gesture that they wanted to really made my day. it cheered me up a lot :D it was so nice of them. it’s wonderful to have wonderful friends :D

yeaaaay *with the stupid grin and tone i always do embarrassingly*

1 med for my breathing suffocation + 1 painkiller + 1 for my bilge before meals + 1 i have no clue what it’s for = 4 very hard sleeping pills! LOL!

off to bed now! TTYL.

Post #400 There’s Something Wrong

the right side of my tummy has been keeping me up all night. it hurts so bad :’( even the pain on my ankle is not really there, because my tummy just got worse and worse as the night goes.

yesterday, all i managed to keep inside me is two glasses of milk, two hot unsweetened tea, and two little breads (roti unyil) everything else i just threw up or, somewhat, i just lost my whole appetite. i spent too much unwanted time on the bathroom floor.

from the afternoon after a little nap, it also hurts a little to breath. it’s like your chest is being step on to with massive shoes. i’ve been feeling this all week actually. the occasional chest pain, and sometimes my heart beats so fast it literally feels like it’s going to blow then the back of my head hurts.

my last hard activity was on monday-wednesday this week. the last three days of school, school examinations. when i was doing the test sometimes there was a very high pitched loud buzzing that would stay ringing in my ears for two-three minutes. and when that happened, my sight just got blurry and there was a bad headache. honestly, this is why when guys on my class played the sound on their phone i got so mad. for me, it’s not just aching pain to hear but it became blurry and all black.

this morning would be the 8th day in a row i woke up at exactly 3:15 AM. since the day after i watched alice in wonderland, i’ve been waking up at exactly 3:15 AM, the clock on the wall would have both hands on the number three and my phone just flashing 3:15. after that i just couldn’t go back to bed because my tummy begun to ache.

medical attention, right now, is a very luxurious privilege for my family. i’m just going to be frank, there’s no money to go to the doctor or for medicine. this is why i cry at night or merely any given time i just burst in to tears because it hurts so bad and i don’t know what the hell is going on.

good morning good morning. imy a.

Post #399 Family

i learned the hard way about it. about mine: THEY GOT BROKEN! that’s the hard cold fact. they tend to brake, well at least mine did.

today another hard cold fact i learn: you don’t have to love all of them. life’s hard and it will punch you in the face. you’ve got to stand stronger. make your own choices, don’t let anyone make ‘em for you.

i still do want to raise my own family. with all its ups-downs love-fights, i still want a family. a whole one. and for my child(ren) to not feel the same way i do growing up.

michael, daniel, maria. i won’t give up for them. the most wonderful things i dream of.

thanks for listening and sharing, a. God blesses you, love.

Post #398 Jesus,

just give all of us the strength to get pass all of this.

my grandparents, timothy, and just anybody who needs help. Your help.

i know You’d hear this, You’d read this.

just, help.

 

You know most what we need and what we can’t say. more than anything You know. i just need You.

 

thank you. i love You.

Post #397 The Names

on my blue note book.. they cheer me up, even on the worst possible days. they’re wonderful.

michael zeppelin, daniel fender, maria canadia. they’re the most wonderful thing i dream of and they’re going to keep going even when my skies are black.

it’s wonderful to have something hang on to when you think you’re world comes crashing down.

whatever it takes, i’m never going to let that bitch ruin it like she does with everything else me and my grandparents have.

i love you and i miss you, a.

Post #396 Super Glad!

i’m super glad i don’t have parents (you know, a mom and dad. yeaah, i don’t have any) because i get to have the best superb loving wonderful grandparents in the world :)

i love you :)